La vida cotidiana

Act I: La mañana

Scene 1
En casa. I wake up to torrential rain, contemplate not going to school, and eventually decide to compromise and take the bus.

"¡Qué horror!" says my señora as I eat breakfast. "¡Qué mal tiempo!"
I want to tell her that this talk is not encouraging me to leave the house and go to class, but it's too early for me to form coherent sentences in Spanish, so I say "Sí" and glare out the window at the rain as I try not to get marmalade on my jeans.

Scene 2
NYU in Madrid. I am attempting to study for my art history exam with intermittent help distractions from my fellow students.

"¿'Paloma' is 'dove' en español, sí?" I ask aloud, in the embarrassing mixture of Spanish and English characteristic of NYU in Madrid students. I'm looking at a painting by El Greco and wondering how I can say that the dove symbolizes the Holy Spirit in Spanish.
"It's more like 'pigeon'," says the girl next to me, who happens to be bilingual.
"Pigeon," I deadpan. "I'm going to be writing about the pigeon of the Espiritu Santo."
"I'm going to stick with 'pájaro'," another girl supplies helpfully.
"The pigeon, que simboliza el Espiritu Santo," I repeat, resting my head on the keyboard. "This is going to end terribly."

[Note: I think the translation of "paloma" depends on your dialect of Spanish, so don't quote me, or her, on it.]

Scene 3
NYU in Madrid. The power goes off as I am taking my grammar exam. (This is a more frequent occurrence than you might think.) My professor suggests that we all move so we're sitting closer to the one window in the room.

Act II: La tarde

Scene 1
Café Segre. I order my usual ("Un montón vegetal y un café solo, por favor, para llevar") plus an extra café con leche for a friend.

"¿Dos cafés?" she asks, looking suspicious.
"Sí," I confirm, "un solo y un con leche, para llevar."
"Solo y con leche," she says, and walks into the kitchen.
Ten minutes later (yes, really), she emerges with my sandwich. I'm already holding both cafés, and hand her €10. She looks at me and my coffee.
"¿Los dos, para ti?" It's not like I've picked them up and am willing to pay for them, or anything.
"Sí, sí."
"Los dos," she repeats. "Un solo y un con leche."
"Sí, gracias." At this point I'm worried she won't let me leave with more than one type of coffee.
"Vale," she says, still looking perplexed, but hands me my change. "Hasta luego."

Act III: La noche

Scene 1
En casa. Violeta, for some unknown reason, has to translate a recipe into English for school. Being the intelligent and technology-savvy teenager she is, she copy-pastes it into Google translate, and then asks me if the English version is correct.

"'First, catch four eggs and break them in the blender'," I read, and laugh.
"It's incorrect?" she asks, in English.
"Sí," I say. "'Catching' the eggs..." but I dissolve into laughter again. Viol looks confused, so I perhaps unwisely switch to Spanish.
"Es como..." I say, "como los huevos..." more laughing, "los huevos escaparon, los huevos están corriendo..." but I can't, I'm laughing too much.
"What is the correct?" she asks.
"'Take'," I say, amidst giggles. "'Take four eggs'."

[Note: the mistranslated word is "coger," which in Spanish can mean "to catch" but also "to get" or "to take."]

Scene 2
En casa. I am looking through a few of the Madrid guidebooks that were in my bedroom when I moved in, trying to decide which one to lend a friend tomorrow. I finally settle on one, and continue reading for a few more minutes in a vain search for indoor activities in this city. I wonder why I haven't picked up this particular guidebook before.

After five minutes, I realize why: it's in Spanish.

And scene.